I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
This house was built for laser tag.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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