awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
