My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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