Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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