i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
So vagazzling was a success
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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