Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
