just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize
