Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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