4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
