I wish i was in the wii world.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
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