spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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