She said her name was "party"
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Randomize
