Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
