I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
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