That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
