U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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