This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
