She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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