no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
