You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
