She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
