your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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