All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
