Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize