There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
i think i have herpe
just one?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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