My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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