I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize