just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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