dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
