There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
organizing the empties. That sober.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize
