eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
