when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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