You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Two words: nipple clamps
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