butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
