I heard we made out
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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