I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
