My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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