Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
