Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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