I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
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