Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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