New invention idea: vibrating tampons
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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