Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
