god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Randomize
