can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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