Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
