Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
