office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
