if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
