I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
