YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
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